PRODIGAL SON
In the narrow
alleys of the barrio word spread like floodwater, and if Juan misbehaved his mother
had her slipper waiting when he got home. “I heard what you did.” At sixteen
he ran away.
In the
city Juan lived by his wits, and was soon smoking fat cigars and wearing gold
rings. But when he was ill, no-one brought soup: when he fell, nobody helped
him up: and when he screamed, nobody heard.
Aged
thirty-two, he returned home, where his mother
clipped his ear. “I heard what you did.”
Juan
smiled happily as she washed the prison stink from his clothes.
................................. .......................................
Thanks to Rochelle for this week's Friday Fictioneers' photo prompt. It reminds me vividly of the narrow alleys I saw in Tenerife, hence my Spanish hero Juan. You can read what other writers made of Jan Marler Morrill's photo by following the links here: https://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/
This is one of my own photos from Tenerife - you can see the resemblance.
This is one of my own photos from Tenerife - you can see the resemblance.
Never too old to be told off by your mum!
ReplyDeleteSo true, as you and I both know!
DeleteI don't mind. Mum's always right. Always.
Delete:)
DeleteGood one, Liz!
ReplyDeleteThanks Robert.
DeleteAh.. maybe in the end he would make good and grow up...
ReplyDeleteHis mother will find him a sensible girl and he'll be fine!
DeleteAlways trust Mum as a safe haven! Nice story, Liz.
ReplyDeleteMum can always be relied on.
DeleteGreat short story.
ReplyDeleteThanks Ladybug.
DeleteEnjoyed the story very much :)
ReplyDeleteStoriesandmore
Glad you liked it, Flower!
DeleteMothers - nothing can replace them. Amazing the similarity between the two photos.
ReplyDeleteI had to check that I hadn't sent the photo to Rochelle!
DeleteThis is great. Looks like Juan is on the right path now.
ReplyDeleteThanks -Ga his mother will keep him in line!
DeleteGreat structure - a whole coming of age story in 100 words. Very good.
ReplyDeleteThanks you Margirene - you always find something nice to say!
DeleteDear Liz,
ReplyDeleteFunny how life makes one appreciate the things that used to irritate. The repetition of "I heard what you did" is effective. Good one.
Shalom,
Rochelle
I hoped someone would comment on that, Rochelle - thanks!
DeleteFor some it takes a little longer to appreciate that momma knows best.
ReplyDeleteMy own kids haven't learned that yet!
DeleteGood story, Liz. I can see a big resemblance between your photo and the picture prompt. My mother didn't physically punish me. She made me feel guilty ahead of time so I wouldn't do wrong in future. That works too. Good writing. :) --- Suzanne
ReplyDeleteI actually can't remcall what my punishments were, though I'm sure there must have been plenty!
Delete