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28.1.16

SANDCASTLE - flash fiction in 100 words

SANDCASTLE

Kate and Robert stared in dismay at the weather-stained house. It wasn’t the luxurious holiday home of the photographs, but the website had promised unlimited wine, so they ventured inside.

The gate clanged shut like prison doors and the interior was gloomy as a dungeon. Light-bulbs flickered, electric points sparked, and the bed was damp. When they couldn’t even open the cellar door they left to find a hotel.


Unseen, the caretaker watched their departure from a cellar window. The absentee owners hadn’t paid her for years – she wasn’t about to share their vintage wine with any putains Anglais. 
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I had to resort to a dictionary this week, as 16 years of learning and speaking Spanish has buried most of my French!  Thank you to ce.ayr for the photograph and to Rochelle for hosting Friday Fictioneers' Flash Fiction each week on her blog  https://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/

An odd thing I have noticed this week - after at least a year of boasting 103 followers - mainly due, I fear, to the A-Z Challenge which I entered for three years - my numbers have suddenly dropped to 95. Should I take this personally or are people simply indulging in an early Spring Clean?
Whatever the reason, thank you for being one of the remaining few. Please leave a comment to let me know you've visited. And no, I will not be entering the A-Z Challenge this year, but I wish the thousands who do the very best of luck.
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28 comments:

  1. Anonymous28/01/2016, 18:55

    I have visited, Liz, and I wiped my feet on the way in.

    I was disconcerted to see that the character names you chose match those of a couple we know. I was worried for their welfare, not to mention a little put out that they'd not mentioned their trip abroad!

    Helen Laycock

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young28/01/2016, 22:02

      They were probably embarrassed about being caught out by a scam!

      Delete
  2. brudberg28/01/2016, 19:05

    Oh.. Not even a dusty bottle... I think in the end it's better to pay the caretaker. Love your approach,

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young28/01/2016, 22:03

      Thanks Bjorn - I wonder how much longer the absentee owners will be able to fool people into renting their chateau?

      Delete
  3. Susan A Eames28/01/2016, 19:37

    House of Sand, eh? Nice story, Liz. (You haven't lost me as a follower if that's any consolation!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young28/01/2016, 22:04

      It is a great consolation, Susan. I looked up Chateau de sable and it actually means sandcastle.

      Delete
  4. Alice Audrey29/01/2016, 05:06

    Serves the owner right, but I feel for the visitors.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young29/01/2016, 07:51

      I just hope they get their money back!

      Delete
    2. liz young29/01/2016, 07:51

      This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
  5. Keiths Ramblings29/01/2016, 12:25

    Good for her. Salute!

    Visit Keith's Ramblings!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Patsy29/01/2016, 12:36

    Unlimited wine would have enticed me inside too!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young29/01/2016, 12:53

      And me - an entire cellar of vintage wine - what's not to like?

      Delete
  7. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields29/01/2016, 13:14

    Dear Liz,

    This reminds me of a few hotels we've had the displeasure of staying in. L'chaim to the caretaker and to the writer. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young29/01/2016, 15:07

      What - you found hotels with unlimited wine? Where?

      Delete
  8. Russell29/01/2016, 17:12

    The unlimited wine got my attention too. Very clever piece, Liz.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young30/01/2016, 16:07

      Thanks Russ - now I know one of your weaknesses!

      Delete
  9. Subroto30/01/2016, 22:00

    Someone once told me this true story about a caretaker who gradually drank his way through a fine collection of Scotch whiskey, replacing the contents with water. I suspect your caretaker is having similar amount of fun.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young31/01/2016, 14:01

      A true story? Wow! I would rather be my caretaker than yours - I prefer wine to whiskey :)

      Delete
  10. Sandra Crook31/01/2016, 11:51

    Can't say I blame the caretaker. An enterprising individual I'd say.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young31/01/2016, 14:02

      If she's got any sense she's selling two bottles for each one she drinks - woman cannot live on wine alone!

      Delete
  11. Gah Learner01/02/2016, 17:07

    Oh, what a mean lady. I love the story though. Poor tourists.

    ReplyDelete
  12. margirene03/02/2016, 05:57

    Great story. And what an enterprising caretaker.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young03/02/2016, 09:53

      Thanks Margirene - she was a woman who thought on her feet. Or perhaps flat on her back, depending on how many bottles she had consumed!

      Delete
  13. Anonymous11/02/2016, 19:18

    You have a finesse for Flash Fiction and conveying so much in so little words. I really enjoyed it and especially liked the ending.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. liz young03/03/2016, 08:03

      Thank you for your comment miss writer.

      Delete
    2. liz young03/03/2016, 08:04

      Thank you for your comment miss writer.

      Delete

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