STORM CLOUDS
“Let’s go for a walk,” he said, “Clear the air.”
I got my coat – I’d be safer with people around.
But the seafront was deserted, and I didn’t know which
was worse – the black storm clouds threatening thunder, or his black mood with
its undertone of violence.
He dragged me along and I stumbled, banging my knee on
the railing. “Don’t be such a wimp,” he said, striding ahead, and I ducked into
a shelter just as the storm hit.
The flash was so bright I didn’t see him fall.
I
waited to be sure before I called the ambulance.
.......................................................................................
A perfectly violent ending for a violent man - I must be feeling in a murderous mood today :) Thanks to Na'ama Yehuda for the atmospheric photograph, and to Rochelle for hosting Friday Fictioneers indefatigably for so many years.
We are all hoping for the recovery from ill health of Ted Strutz, one of our number who supplied last week's prompt. Get well soon, Ted.
hey sometimes a lady has to do what she has to do~
ReplyDeleteMother Nature knows best!
DeleteDivine retribution? Or a lucky accident?
ReplyDeleteA but if both, methinks.
DeleteShe needed a little light in her life. It couldn't have come in a better way.
ReplyDeleteJust at the right time, too!.
DeleteDear Liz,
ReplyDeleteKarma came just in time.
Shalom,
Rochelle
I won't she'd many years for him, that's for sure!
DeleteHe is blessed he died quick, as he deserved worse. But don't we all... Good story and I like how you used the storm to parallel his violence.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jade.
DeleteThe sun always comes out after a storm!
ReplyDeleteAs proved by the weather here today, a mix of sun and rain!
DeleteRotten bully! Glad he shocked! Good story.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mason.
DeleteYay, I was hoping he'd get washed into the sea but a lightning strike is even better :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, it's more final, isn't it?
DeleteWow, what a great ending. Karma is a bitch. :)
ReplyDeleteKarma is impartial.
DeleteStruck it lucky it seems! Nice one Liz.
ReplyDeleteThanks Keith, I like what you did there.
DeleteOooh! I like this a lot. I love it when voilent jerks get what they deserve. Brava!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Susan, I like a swift retribution too.
Deleteit was like saying he inherited the wind... er, the lightning. :)
ReplyDeleteHe did - or at least, earned it!
DeleteHer life certainly lit up after that, I'd be thinking. Excellent use of atmosphere for this.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Miles.
DeleteI wonder how long it took her to realise that she was permanently free of him, and whether she grieved.
ReplyDeleteShe may have grieved - grief often takes us by surprise.
DeleteThanks for welcoming a bit of wrath into the scene before any other peril entered. May it truly "clear the air" of such contemptible behavior.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Steven.
DeleteGood story Liz. Like the comparison of the black storm and his black mood.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Wilts, glad you worked your way through the barriers to comment!
DeleteI liked the businesslike last line after the fiery buildup. Nicely done.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Subroto.
DeleteI must say, he did have it coming. Have a great day!
ReplyDeleteGlad you agree with me, Anne x
Delete