13/09/2018

HANS AND GRETA - a one hundred word story for Friday Fictioneers


HANS & GRETA

Every hour, on the hour, the carved doors swung open and Hans moved smoothly to meet Greta. Watched by townsfolk and tourists alike, they leaned towards each other to kiss, then danced to a foot-tapping peasant tune before parting company.

Behind those closed doors Hans and Greta lived in a comfortless world of jigsaw lights and intricate draughts, fires that never stayed lit, curtains blown frantic by every breeze, and constant chest infections.

One bitter winter day the doors opened on emptiness - relieved only by a hand-painted sign: ‘Couple wanted. Free accommodation. Must be reliable.’
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Here I am again, after a week off writing while we moved house. We are now living in an old cottage and, although I have some painting and other odd jobs still to do, we are settling in. There are twenty of them, owned by a Village Trust, and we are very lucky to have been offered one.
Must dash - I now have a garden and it's in need of some TLC  :)


48 comments:

  1. Lovely! Everyone deserves a comfy home.

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  2. I loved that magical little tale!

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  3. And who could blame them? Thanks for making me smile. :)

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

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  4. You've imagined a fun story of domestic discomfort shared by a couple of 'civilised mechanicals'. I loved the way you had Hans and Greta put on a brave face for their audience despite their unpleasant living conditions. Great conclusion, too!

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  5. That does not sound a happy existence!

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    1. Can't blame them for leaving, can you?

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  6. I think I'd leave too! Nobody likes a chest infection.

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    1. You'd think their hacking coughs would have alerted the townsfolk to their plight!

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  7. It will remain empty for quite a while I suspect! A great little tale.

    Click to visit Keith's Ramblings!

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    1. Thanks Keith - would you take the job?

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  8. Good for them, to chase after their happy ending. Great story.

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    1. They stuck it out for long enough, I think.

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  9. Dear Liz,

    Happy that Hans and Greta flew the coup...or clock as it were. Clever story.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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  10. Is your new place drafty enough to add inspiration to the story?

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    1. It might be unless I get those door curtains soon!

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  11. Congrats on the new place

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  12. Cracking stuff, love the realism of imaginary characters. I've been following a theme similar to yours for a few months in the FF, where they are now, the children story characters. Very good.

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    1. Thank you. Your comment has no name attached so I can't be sure I've read yours!

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  13. I love the idea of Hans and Greta being real people. Love your explanation of what goes on inside the clock!

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    1. Thanks Alicia - I have always endowed model people with real lives, since I was a child!

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  14. sounds like this is a bit connected to your new place - and hope you settle in well.
    nice take on the prompt

    _ priorhouse

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    1. Actually our old place was draught free, but we're delighted to be in the cottage!

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  15. Haha, I can imagine all the people waiting for the clock to strike, cameras at the ready, then out comes this little note :-)

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    1. Glad I tickled your funny bone, Alistair.

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  16. I'm so glad Hans and Greta found another situation, hopefully a better one. They deserve it! Congratulations on your cottage and garden. Sounds lovely!

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    1. Thank you Brenda, I am sure they're settled by now somewhere warmer.

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    2. What a beautifully written piece. Witty, clever, subtle. One of those lovely examples of the writer being utterly in charge of the theme and therefore undetectable. I want Chapter Two. And the rest. Jilly, Sugar on the Bee.

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    3. Thanks Jilly - chapter two? What would their next job be, I wonder?

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  17. Interesting little tale. I enjoyed it. Good luck in your new home, I hope you'll be very happy.

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  18. Charming. I hope everyone is pleased with their new home.

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    1. Well, we are - I haven't heard from Hans and Greta!

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  19. Clever perspective.
    Enjoy your new home.

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  20. This is brilliant. What a fun idea to make the figures real. I hope they found a better place. And the street with these cottages looks lovely.

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    1. Thank you GaH - and the little walkway is sweet, isn't it!

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  21. There's nothing that's free... I wonder if the poor cuckoo also left.

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    1. Perhaps the cuckoo was glad to have the place to himself?

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