08/05/2014

SMELLY NELLIE - 100 word fiction

Each week members of Friday Fictioneers from around the world post their 100-word stories prompted by a photograph on Rochelle's blog. You can read the others by following the link on her blog:  http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/
Meanwhile, here's mine.


NELLIE

The town didn’t take much notice of the bag-lady trundling her trolley-world along the promenade.
“One day my ship will come in,” she’d say when she collected her pension, but nobody listened. ‘Smelly Nellie’ they called her, but not to her face – it was rumoured she could freeze you with a glare if she’d a mind to.

Then one night some drunks staggering home along the seafront claimed they’d seen a UFO. The next day the only sign that Nellie had ever existed was her trolley lying empty on the sands.

It was strange how much they missed her.

25 comments:

  1. Looks like Smelly Nellie's ship DID come in after all. Funny!

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    2. Was it a plane? Was it a bird? No, it was a spaceship!

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  2. I think the lyrics go
    "..Don't it always seem to go
    That you don't know what you've got
    Till it's gone.."
    And it seems even smelly alien bag-ladies are included.

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    1. Maybe she really could freeze them with a glare?

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  3. This was an interesting twist to this story - quite enjoyed how you considered the use of the trolley as a focal point - considering how small it is in the image - but how significant its presence feels.

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    1. Thank you Patricia - the trolley is small but it's in the foreground and it caught my imagination more than the barely-visible background.

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  4. I love this! It reminds me of Independence Day (I think?) Where the crazy drunk guy was right all along. I'm sure there's a rational explanation. ;-)

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    1. sorry - I probably saw that film years ago but I can't remember it! Glad you liked my story, though.

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  5. Hmmm... she sounds familiar.

    *parks trolley*

    Another good 'un, Liz. You've really got what it takes to create these mini masterpieces!

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    1. Masterpieces? Helen, I think I love you!

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    1. She's gone to a better place - wherever that is!

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  7. Lizy, I like this story and I think the kernel of truth is there--that we often get used to even unsavory people and places, making it seem odd when there gone. The larger question of where Nellie went and how is far beyond me. Maybe Mulder has an idea.

    janet

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    1. Thanks Janet - and it is a Mulder story, isn't it? The truth is out there.

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  8. Dear Liz,

    I love the journey you took me on with this one. Reminds me of the Traveling Wilbury's song Maxine. If you want to hear it click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThAS4FNjm-g

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. thanks for the musical interlude, Rochelle!

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  9. There was something about her that was special that they never saw before. That's what's most intriguing to me. Thanks!

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    1. Some people walk through our lives un-noticed until they go.

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  10. Ah.. wonder if it was that lizard buried under her wrinkly skin that smelled... hmm Intriguing mystery.

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    1. Could be, Bjorn - one of these days perhaps I'll expend the story!

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  11. Wonderful.. First I loved her trolley-world. Next I loved the fact that she was "invisible" until she was gone then people saw how much they missed her.
    Alicia Jamtaas

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    1. So far I have managed not to say to my kids, "You'll miss me when I'm gone," but sometimes I've been close!

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  12. Lizy, Many towns have someone who is considered the "local character.' When something happens to them people notice because they have become part of the local lore. I hope Nellie is in a better place. Well written. :)

    Susan

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    1. Yes, and then they ask each other, "Whatever became of so-and-so?" but no-one does anything.
      So you're Susan? I've been thinking of you as Josh all this time!

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Leave a comment, please - I will reply to everyone.