04/04/2019

NOT LOST BUT HIDING - a 100 word story


NOT LOST BUT HIDING

“You lost her?” Ellie’s mum shrieked. “It’s getting dark and she’s only seven!”
“She just ran off,” Roy mumbled. “You know how thick those woods are.”
“You’re the thick one – now we’ll have to go back out there and find her.”

Ellie didn’t like the woods at night – all those trees looming, the brambles clutching at her dress – and she was scared. When she saw the torches she nearly called out – until she heard his voice.

She didn’t want to be found after all – at least, not by Uncle Roy.
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Ronda del Baccio's photo inspired a dark story this week - my first for a fortnight as I have been on holiday with my daughters and granddaughter. We were looking forward to a week of sunshine but the weather had other plans. One day of torrential rain, another of showers, but we managed a couple of mornings on the beach and a few delicious meals out, so I came home refreshed.

Since my return I have been concentrating on a severe rewrite of the third book in my Living Rock series, and have finally settled on its title - Rock Fall. If you haven't read the first two, now is your chance - A Volcanic Race and Wolf Pack are available on Amazon in print or ebook.

Along with many other writers I am also tweeting a Very Short Story on Twitter regularly, prompted by a word chosen by #vss365. If you would like to read those, my tag is @young_liz.

32 comments:

  1. Dear Liz,

    A lot of story in the last line. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Rochelle - it was the photo that did it!

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  2. Replies
    1. Thanks Iain - hopefully someone else came along to find her.

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  3. Oh ouch.
    Nasty stuff at the end, Liz.

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    1. Yes, I'm afraid so - prompted by me fear of losing my small granddaughter, I suspect.

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  4. Oh, that's quite the punch to the gut in the end. Excellent story.

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  5. Powerful story, Liz - I wasn't expecting that final line.

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

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    1. Odd, isn't it - because I knew the end I was aiming for, I didn't realise it would come as a surprise to others!

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  6. So cleverly done, Lizy. You never stated a thing, but we know everything. That's how to make 100 words do the work of 1,000

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    1. Neil, thank you - that comment made me blush!

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  7. Oh, poor girl! That last line changed everything!
    Well done, Madam!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Dale. Have you moved yet?

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    2. June 1st! Gonna be here before I know it... till then, trying to organise.
      Sorry I answer so late. I never get the notification you have responded despite the fact I follow you (I don't get those notifications, either.) Sigh..

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  8. Beautifully told, Liz. The switch of pov in your last line makes everything sickeningly clear.

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  9. family secret better come out soon or she'll gonna be lost forever.

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    Replies
    1. I hope mum finds her and learns why ahe ran off.

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  10. Very powerfully told. This is excellent.

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  11. What a shock at the end. I thought the dialogue at the start was gripping, and it is, but the twist at the end casts a different light on it all. Terrific.

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  12. Oh my...that poor little girl!
    Great story.

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  13. Uncle Roy clearly needs to be in prison.

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  14. Oh how sad, too scared to be found. Nicely written story!

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    Replies
    1. If she's lucky there will be more people with Uncle Roy and she'll be safe.

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