06/04/2017

THE WATCHER - flash fiction in 100 words

THE  WATCHER

“He was there again today, Mum!”
Davey’s voice preceded him down the hall, followed by the slam of the front door, the thud as his schoolbag hit the floor, and finally his appearance in the livingroom.
Sandra turned the television down a fraction. “Who was, Davey?”
“That man who watches me, I told you. Can’t you fetch me in the car?”
“You’re big enough to cycle home, Davey, and anyway, I’m too busy.”

The next day there were no homecoming sounds, but by the time Sandra realised, it was too late.

They found Davey’s bike still chained to the lamp-post.
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Each week Rochelle posts a photo prompt on her blog  https://rochellewisoff.com/  which dozens of Friday Fictioneers use to inspire 100 word stories. Thaks to Jellico's Stationhouse for this week's image. Follow the blue froggy link on Rochelle's blog to read the others after leaving a comment here :)

24 comments:

  1. Excellent, Liz. I didn't think you had a 'dark' side in you. Perhaps I should get out more!!

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    1. I've been accused at times of overdoing the dark.

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  2. Wow, Liz, as usual, you have written quite a wonderful little story. Sad to think that way too many little ones end up this way.

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    1. Sad indeed, and not always because mothers are inattentive.

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  3. Dear Liz,

    That was a gut wrencher for sure. Mum should've listened. But it's easy to pass those things off, isn't it? Very well written.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. She should have turned the TV off, at least.

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  4. Chilling. Every parents worst nightmare. Great write.

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    1. When I first let my children walk home alone - a 3 minute walk - I watched the road like a hawk!

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  5. Grim story so far, I hope that Davey is rescued, having been nabbed by his long lost errant father

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  6. Oh my goodness! Well done for shocking me, Liz! :)

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

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  7. Such a tragic story. Mum will never get over the guilt, in this case she should have been suspicious. It's tough, kids can't be watched all the time.

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    1. 'If only' are the saddest words, but she should have paid more aatention to her son than to the TV.

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  8. Oh sweet jeezus! Poor Davey...poor mum!

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    1. Quite so. Thanks for your comment, Dawn.

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  9. No time indeed! Turn the television off and help! You can tell this was a good story because it made me angry as all get out. Well done.

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    1. Precisely. I am glad my story stirred your emotions, Alicia, but I hope anger didn't spoil your weekend!

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  10. Replies
    1. Thanks for your comment, Sandra.

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  11. Brilliantly concise, as usual.

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    1. thanks Liz - I do hope you'll keep this comment channel open after April!

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