06/04/2016

NO SMOKING - a 100 word story

NO SMOKING

Alison was a retired teacher, and her door and biscuit tin were always open for the neighbourhood youngsters, who would drop in to seek her help with their homework, watch her television, and stroke her cats.
Alison loved them all but didn’t stand for any nonsense, and when two teenage girls lit up in her kitchen she removed their cigarettes and ran them under the tap.

An icy chill turned her round just as young hands closed on her throat, and she looked into eyes like empty windows onto a black soul while a knife slid between her ribs.

25 comments:

  1. Oof! Didn't see that coming. Back on form, Lizy?

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    1. Alison didn't see it coming either.

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  2. Blimey, Lizy. Where did that come from?

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    1. Blank windows have always spooked me!

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  3. OMG! That turned quickly. Pity she didn't. Great twist.

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    1. i fear she was doomed the moment she let them into her house - like that woman in the news this week murdered by two girls 'for fun'.

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  4. Thankless girls! They really didn't want to be told what to do, did they? That was an unexpected twist and it worked well.

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    1. Thanks margirene - it was awful how her trust was betrayed.

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  5. Teenagers! Had she confiscated their smart phones too?

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    1. That would probably have earned her a slower and more painful death.

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  6. Sad sad sad... what happens in minds like that... good things that most kids are good and most grown-ups are not pedophiles..

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    1. Yes, the bigger picture is comforting, despite the two young girls jailed htis week in UK for a murder.

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  7. Ay, this was unsettling. In a good way. Poor Alison.

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    1. When I was in my teens we used to spend Sunday afternoons in the house of a lonely woman, playing records and drinking tea.

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  8. as they say, you can't win them all with kindness. sad story.

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  9. Dear Liz,

    Disturbing piece in light of some of the comments above. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. Thanks Rochelle - it's frightening how many disturbed children there are.

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  10. Dark and scary because incidents like these are not just fictional anymore.

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    1. This kind of terror rocks one's sense of balance.

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    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  11. Crikey! What were they smoking???

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  12. Great tragic twist at the end, Liz. You have to watch who you let into your house these days. Maybe that's where the fictional rule about vampires came from. Those "black" eyes get to me too. Well done. ---- Suzanne

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