02/12/2015

EMAIL TO THE BUILDER - 100 word story

EMAIL to HYDDEN HOLMES : Our ref: New Build No:3847
Sirs
We are in receipt of your final invoice for the above property, which we will only settle when you have completed the work to our satisfaction.

Your architectural drawings showed an idyllic rural setting, not this urban wasteland in the shadow of high-rise offices, and the admittedly well-constructed underground dwelling is ruined by the stench of sewage which indicates a serious malfunction in the extraction system.

The major problem is with the access. In view of recent world events, we ordered the Deluxe version with concealed entrance which, from the attached photograph, it is clear you have failed to deliver.

Regards.

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Yet another swiftly-written story, prompted by the photo taken by Roger Bultot and posted on Rochelle's blog  https://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/  for Friday Fictioneers.  To read how other writers interpreted the photo, follow the Blue Frog trail on her blog.



32 comments:

  1. Nice take on the photo. A difficult one, this week. I'd have been stumped. The photo itself raises many questions!

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    1. It does. I even considered a Dr Whoo take-off, but my knowledge of that programme is too limited!

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  2. Ha.. that was a great idea.. I would say that some errors has been made in the marketing of said property...

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    1. First rule of house-buying - never trust an estate agent.

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  3. I've got to admit, it's not much as concealed entrances go. Such a different take on the prompt. :)

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    1. Obviously not the Deluxe version!

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  4. Dear Liz,

    I love the letter form you used to tell the story. I hope her issues will be addressed in short order. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. Thanks Rochelle. We've had a few building issues recently, which possibly prompted this take on the photo!

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  5. This was a great read! I have to agree, the so-called concealed entrance isn't so much so!

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    1. Thanks Dale - not so much hidden as obvious!

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  6. Those builders are cowboys!

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  7. Good help is so hard to find! I love this one!

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    1. Thanks Loma - good builders are even harder to find!

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  8. Great take on the prompt, Liz. The entrance can probably be fixed, but I don't have much confidence in removing the sewage smell.

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    1. Especially if the builders have fake qualifications. (Guess who's been watching Fake Britain this morning?)

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  9. Isn't it always the case with builders... Nice format for the story and it was subtly funny.

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    1. Yhsnkd Sndumsni - and I'm glad the humour came through.

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  10. Not a concealed entrance and the sewage would not be a plus. :)

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    1. Especially with no ourside windows!

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  11. Well, if you want to hide from the world's harsh realities underground, you gotta live with the smell and the rats. Great story, I love it.

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    1. Not if you've paid top dollar for a reliable extraction system!

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  12. Bureaucracy survives Armageddon? This is a really sad story.

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    1. Burreaucracy will survive everything!

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  13. This is great. I love the language of the email - so polite and understated. I am a bit worried, as we are about to engage a builder to construct our new house. I'll be very careful to monitor its progress after reading your story.

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    1. You're having a house built? How wonderful - and the best of luck!

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  14. A unique take on the way to present your story. Enjoyed! (My second try to comment... the first one glitched?)

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    1. thanks for persevering, Roger - and I'm glad you enjoyed my story.

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  15. Love the official tone in this letter. Very believable.

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