09/10/2014

HOPE - a story in 100 words

After a hectic week celebrating two birthdays - my husband's and my daughter's - here I am again with a story prompted by a photo on -
http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/
HOPE

Molly eased herself into the chair, careful not to move it from the dents in the carpet. Her feet only just reached the floor.
She spread her fingers over the keys, imagining younger, sinewy hands, closed her eyes and air-played a song.
 Painful tears dripped onto her blouse.

The door opened, but it was only Paul.
“You’re always in here – I’m getting rid of this stuff.”
“Don’t you dare!”
“It’s been two years.”
“He’ll come home.”

Paul flicked the cymbal as he left.
The sound vibrated through Molly’s soul before soaring out into the world - a message of love and hope.

20 comments:

  1. Really nicely written. I thought at first that these two are brother and sister and their father had gone, because the girl's feet only just reach the floor, but then she imagines younger hands, so now I'm a little confused - husband and wife (a short wife!) whose son has gone?

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    1. Molly's the long-gone-son's mother and Paul his father.

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  2. That's beautiful, Lizy.

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  3. Well done. You really conveyed the feeling of sadness.

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  4. I know people who have left a room exactly as it was when a loved one died. To me, that's like picking at an open sore and not allowing it to heal. In this story, we don't know if Molly has heard from him in the two year period or not, but I can appreciate her holding on to the hope. A very touching story, Liz.

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    1. Thank you Russell. Tis story came from two sources - a musical friend died recently, and I haven't seen my own son for ages, although I do know where he is - across the Pond.

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  5. Dear Lizy, Well written and you can feel the pain in the mother's thoughts. I think the father should let her have her shrine as long as she wants it. Everyone mourns for different lengths of time and who knows - he might just show up one day and want his old room back! Excellent! Nan :)

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    1. Dear Nan - I suppose this mother is mourning, though her son is still alive somewhere. Thanks for visiting so often. :)

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  6. I got the feeling that the son was missing and hadn't been in touch, so could be dead or alive. The sadness conveyed beautifully. I have two sons, one is a communicator, the other is not. Both fit and well, but completely different characters. I know how Molly feels.

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    1. So do I, Maggie, hence the story perhaps. My daughters are regularly in touch, but my sons not. One lives abroad and if I didn't call him I would hear once a year if I was lucky. Sad doesn't even come close.

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  7. Dear Liz,

    It's hard for a mother go give up on a missing child. At least I imagine it would be. It's hard enough having mine so far away.

    Perhaps it is time for this mom to move on. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. This mum - me - would pack the instruments away after two years, but never give up. My cousin's son left in a huff twenty years ago and she still yearns for him.

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  8. Very touching. I wasn't sure if Paul died or took off, but either way the story works.

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    1. Thanks Perry - Paul is the husband and the son took off.

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  9. This is a story that leaves me sad in a way,,, there's probably not much hope... a musician is usually to focused on just one mistress

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    1. Oh Bjorn! Now you've depressed me too! I was hoping he's come home. :(

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